


A wolf's den

by WinteryFall



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fluff, For once Bucky is chill, I saw Infinity war and had to write this, Internal Monologue, Kissing, M/M, SO MUCH FLUFF, Sleepy Cuddles, Steve is troubled, armless Bucky, fluff theraphy, my feels, my poor feels are dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 15:58:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14500500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinteryFall/pseuds/WinteryFall
Summary: Infinity War broke my feels, and made me hate grapes.So, I wrote this random one-shot as a fluff therapy to ease my poor heart. There is a pic accompanied with this that I'd love to add to the story, but I dunno how to do that, so I'll just link it here.illustrationAnyways; about the story itself;The former Captain drops by to the White Wolf's den, and the wolf has to lull the stupid punk to sleep because he is needed tomorrow.





	A wolf's den

The nights in Wakanda were warm, but not as warm as he’d expected.

Still, it was much more pleasant than the chill of the ice he’d been encased for seventy years.

The blond sits awake at the hut’s doorway, gazing into the clear skies. Stars were _much_ easier to see out here when comparing to his home back in Brooklyn. They always brought a sense of wonder, but also made one feel extremely small in the grand scheme of things.

Steve sighs, brushing trough his hair - Sam kept joking he’d soon need a haircut or soon he’d be tripping over it - glancing back towards inside of the small house.

A figure was resting amidst a bunch of blankets and pillows, sleeping more peacefully than he likely had in years.

The blonde couldn’t stop but smile a little at the sight; he had not seen Bucky this calm in _ages_. Ever since Washington - hell, ever since Zola’s lab - his childhood friend had carried an aura of anxiety in him, and Steve had hated it how he had no clue how to help him, how to ease his mind from it. The man was forever grateful to the King of Wakanda, as well as his feisty sister, for choosing to help Bucky despite everything.

After a moment longer of watching the stars quietly, Steve gets up and heads back inside, knowing he should get some rest before they’d head out again tomorrow. He, Sam and Natasha had dropped by to gather their bearings and rest for a bit, though his main reason had been to go and see Bucky. Some of the medical staff who’d been helping Shuri with his recovery process had been reluctant on letting Steve so deep into their country, but the girl had swiftly dismissed them, informing that since Steve was an ally of her brother, he was allowed to at least go see his 'sad puppy' of a friend.

None of them had dared to try and argue with her.

The blond takes a moment to just sit and gaze at the sleeping brunet. His face was completely lax save from a small smile on his face, a result of knowing Steve was with him. At least, according to Shuri she'd never seen Bucky smile while he slept, so it had to have something to do with Steve's presence.

The brown hair was longer than it had ever been, though Steve didn’t mind it.

He’d resisted the urge to comb trough this the whole evening they’d been chatting, sitting on the edge of the lake and just catching up on what they’d been doing. The blond still couldn’t stop but feel a little overwhelmed about the fact Bucky was right beside him, and _not_ dead, lying frozen in a ditch somewhere in Europe. He only wished his surprising survival had not come in a way it had.

His blue eyes drift at his left side, where the stump of Bucky’s long gone arm was exposed to the nightly air; the blue canvas he usually wore to cover it had slipped out of place, so Steve shifts to put it back on properly.

Seeing it always filled Steve with immense guilt; he’d lost that arm twice, both were his fault in a way.

Yet, the brunet never complained, he never blamed Steve for anything, even if he should.

He sucks in a deep breath and shakes his head, knowing this was not the tame to wallow in self-pity. Steve lies down beside the sleeping brunet, an arm sneaking over his waist to just sort of rest there, above all the blankets. He looked rather cozy right now, and it was almost amusing, how between the two he was the one feeling shaky right now, when Bucky had had the short end of the stick mostly.

Despite his best efforts, Steve could _not_ bring himself to close his eyes and fall asleep.

It was... often a problem when he came to visit Bucky.

He’d end up not getting almost any sleep, because he was afraid if he’d close his eyes, the brunet would disappear and all this would just be a dream. It was foolish paranoia, but he couldn’t help it. Part of him wished he’d be denied access to see Bucky, but it was fairly obvious that none of the Wakandans involved had the heart to do so, for they could tell how important the person they’d taken under their wing was for Steve and vise-versa.

Plus, nobody really wanted to try and argue with Shuri, the girl was fiery and stood her ground. Steve really admired that, and could tell his friends did too, given how amused and impressed they looked when the King's sister made her point across to those who didn't want to let Steve come here.

His hand rose slowly, and after a moment of hesitation, Steve brushes an escaped lock of brown hair away from the sleeping figure’s face, finally giving in to his need to comb trough the long hair.

Given they were taken better care of, Bucky’s hair felt silky under his fingertips and not coarse like it had looked when he’d initially encountered the Winter Soldier.

The brunet shifts in his sleep, tilting his head more towards Steve, making the blond smile lightly.

”It’s still hard to believe sometimes...”

He mutters out quietly, brushing his fingers over Bucky’s jaw. His stubble was getting longer and would probably need shaving soon. His beard would need it too, though Steve had a slight impression the brunet actually liked it, as he’d made a point to touch it while they’d been talking, though he’d masked it under a veil of lighthearted teasing.

_”Didn’t think you could grow a beard!”_

It had been such a miracle to see him laugh, that it almost made Steve’s heart ache. He was so much better now, than what he had been when they’d initially found the man hiding in Romania. Without really thinking, Steve shifts closer and rests his forehead against Bucky’s shoulder, the one that had no arm attached to it currently. He needed to get some sleep, their missions were tough and long, and even if he was a super-soldier, even Steve Rogers needed some rest.

It was just hard to do when something you held dear perhaps even moreso than your own life rested beside you, reminding you of all the things you _couldn’t_ prevent, or worse, the things you could’ve if you’d just made the right choice.

When you were too afraid to close your eyes, fearing it would disappear.

Steve hadn’t even noticed he’d started shaking, not until he felt the presence beside him shift, and a quiet, sleep-groggy voice snaps him out of his thoughts.

”Stevie?”

The blond looks up instantly, finding Bucky’s blue eyes look at him with hazed confusion. It doesn’t take him that long to sense Steve’s mood once his vision clears however, and the brunet frowns, managing to shift on his side so he could face the blond. Steve had pulled his arm back instantly upon sensing Bucky was awake, but he kept it between them, secretly glad when Bucky places his own beside his.

”You should be sleeping; Sam and Natasha will need you tomorrow.”

”Yeah, I know. It’s been... stressful so it’s kind of hard to sleep.”

The blond admits with a sheepish laugh, his hand twitching with desperate need to cover the one right beside his.

He didn’t do anything however, not wanting to worry Bucky any further than he already did.

The brunet examines him quietly for a long time, before sighing and shaking his head with a tired smile.

”Seriously Steve; I’m _not_ gonna make a run for it the second you look away. If I would, I’d done it already.”

”You did, sort of.”

The blond points out with a tight chuckle, trying to keep his voice from shaking. Bucky grimaces, knowing he couldn’t deny that; he’d gone and disappeared after the whole triskelion battle after all, and it had taken ages to find him. He could still recall Steve’s face when he’d finally found him again.

The blond had been very cautious and concerned - and for a good reason - but there had also been relief in there.

The brunet honestly felt bad, just how much the blond loved him; he was that one thing that could potentially make Steve throw the entire damn world under a bus, and Bucky had never intended to become such a trigger. It was what it was however.

At least the damn punk wasn’t sitting on his ass beside him, giving his droopy puppy eyes at Bucky 24/7; instead, he was out there, doing his usual hero-business like he damn well should. The brunet was mostly fine now, and he actually believed it now when he stated it. Steve didn't have to worry so much, the Wakandans had taken good care of him.

”Well I’m not going anywhere now.”

The brunet tells him firmly, covering the pale hand beside his.

He could feel Steve tense under his touch, and he swallowed down hardly almost if trying to stop himself from tearing up or something. It honestly concerned Bucky, for this happened almost every time Steve came to visit him. He’d stay up very late, watching him sleep thinking Bucky was out cold, emanating this same, shaky aura that felt like the blond was moments away from bursting from the seams.

As the brunet examined the man resting beside him, the man he’d known for such a long time - even if some memories were still jumbled - he could see all the wear and tear Steve’s unnaturally long and complex life had left him with.

That angry little punk from Brooklyn was still there, but he was accompanied by a battle-hardened veteran, an old man who sometimes barely kept it together.

Bucky _knew_ how that felt, for both of their lives had been long, hard and filled with extremes.

As their eyes met, the brunet noted Steve found it hard to look at him into the eyes, which the brunet knew the reason behind of; shame and guilt. It was always there.

Bucky squeezes the hand he was holding firm enough to gain Steve’s attention, and he reluctantly turns his gaze back to Bucky, who locks his gaze with the blond, moving his hand to grasp his beard-covered jaw to make sure he didn’t try to look away again.

”I mean it. End of the line remember?”

”I don’t really deserve that, Buck.”

Steve manages to chuckle out shakily, gaining a tired, borderline annoyed huff from his companion.

”I don’t really care if you do or not; I made a promise, I intend on keeping it.”

Steve says nothing to that, just gazes at Bucky, who removes his hand slowly from his jaw, resting it on top of his again. His touch felt warm, warmer than he’d been for years likely. The longer he examined the brunet, the worse the aching feeling in his chest became. He felt it every time he came here, but somehow this time was worse, perhaps because Bucky was awake, and looking at him, telling him he’d be there regardless of everything.

It felt so _wrong_ , Bucky should not be this forgiving.

Hell, Steve more than accepted if Tony would hate him for the rest of his life; he deserved that honestly, for he should’ve told the billionaire about his parents.

He hated the thought, but if it happened, he’d deserve it.

Bucky had been another person forced to suffer because of him, and it was worse because this man was someone with much more impact to his life; someone he’d known since childhood, someone that had gone to war with him. He would’ve never made it to the damn super-soldier program had Bucky not helped keeping his weak, sickly self alive. He could’ve perished several times on the battle-field had it not been Bucky’s excellent sniper-skills. He could’ve drowned back in Washington, had Bucky not fished him out of the water.

He owned this man so much, but all he’d given back for his loyalty was more and more trouble.

”Steve.”

The soft, concerned tone and a hand cupping his cheek, thumb brushing over the skin beneath his eye made the blond realize he’d ended up shedding a tear after all. The blond shakes his head and attempts to smile, but it wasn’t exactly convincing.

”I don’t deserve someone like you.”

”It doesn’t matter if you do or not; I _chose_ to follow you, and I’d make that same choice again.”

Bucky tells him firmly, getting a bit frustrated over Steve’s dramatics.

He got why the blond felt guilty, but it didn’t make any sense to the brunet.

 _Steve_ didn’t push him off that damn train, sew a metallic arm on his body, and make him kill a bunch of people against his will. _None_ of that was his fault.

”I know Buck. You can be as stubborn as me.”

”I have to, to keep up with your reckless ass.”

The brunet remarks, hoping to get some of that somber look off Steve’s face. The trick worked somewhat as Steve does chuckle a bit, but that weighed look doesn’t quite vanish. After a moment of silence, with Steve watching their joined hands seemingly lost in thought, the blond suddenly moves them and brings Bucky’s hand to his lips, kissing the knuckles gently.

The tender action takes the brunet by surprise, and he just gazes at Steve with widened eyes, but eventually just sigh and shakes his head lightly with a small smile dancing on his lips.

”You damn sap.”

The brunet tells him fondly, and the blond chuckles a bit, squeezing the hand he was holding.

For a moment Steve just examines him again, to the point it was pretty clear to Bucky that getting him to sleep would not be easy.

If he didn’t come up with something rather soon, Steve would be more than happy to spend his night watching the brunet sleep again, like he usually did when dropping by. Bucky would not allow the stubborn idiot to exhaust himself over something stupid like this anymore, so he releases a slow sigh, frowning deeply as he decides on what to do.

”Bucky?”

The blond asks a little confused about the sudden frown aimed at him, but the brunet doesn’t respond, simply releases his only hand from Steve’s hold, before cupping his cheek and leaning closer, up until their foreheads touched. The beard was still a slightly foreign feeling on Steve’s face, but Bucky liked the rough texture nevertheless. He could hear Steve’s breath hitch lightly upon realizing how close they were, but Bucky didn’t let that discourage him; he knew this stubborn punk well enough by now to tell he was not going to dislike what the brunet was about to do.

Softly, Bucky places a slight kiss at the corner of his mouth, just enough to make his companion freeze for a second, before Steve sought out his lips in turn, and Bucky allows himself to be kissed, slipping his hand down to rest it against Steve’s warm chest.

When the blond pulls back, his ryes were wide with awe, but they were also shining with hundreds of unspoken words and emotions, and he looked about ready to burst into tears again, though not necessarily out of sadness.

The brunet slips his hand around Steve and manages to shift closer despite lacking an arm, allowing the blond to momentarily rest his head against his chest, an arm wrapping firmly around Bucky, squeezing him lightly as Steve attempts to get his breathing back under control.

Bucky mingles his fingers into the longer than normal blond hair, pressing a quick peck at the top of Steve’s head.

”I’m gonna be here okay? You can go to sleep and I’ll be here in the morning.”

The blond doesn’t really say anything coherent, just presses closer to him, and the brunet sighs, combing trough his hair, waiting for Steve to get himself back under control.

Eventually, he felt Steve lift his head, and from the slight touch he felt against his neck, it was pretty clear what the man was after.

Bucky tilts his head to allow their lips press together again in a soft kiss, though this one lasted longer, long enough to make the brunet pant a bit as they parted.

”....This should probably feel strange, but it doesn’t.”

Steve comments with a breathless chuckle after a moment, lifting his hand to mingle his fingers into Bucky’s hair in turn now. The brunet hums with an one armed shrug.

”You make it _pretty_ obvious, Stevie; I swear if you keep looking at me all sappy like that you’ll give me a damn cavity.”

Bucky informs him with a light-hearted smirk, which grew into a slight snicker upon him noticing Steve’s face actually gain slight color.

”You’re such a jerk sometimes.”

Steve complains half-heartedly, unable to stop himself from probably having the worst lovesick puppy look in his face he could muster. He’d always been the type to wear his heart in his sleeve, and out of all the people in the world, Bucky was that one person left who could lower his guard this much.

”Yeah yeah, you love me anyway.”

Bucky chuckles at that, then turns abruptly silent upon noting the heavy gaze aimed at him. His words had been meant as a light-hearted jab, but the brunet realized they probably meant much more to Steve than one would have initially thought.

Because he did.

Steve loved him with every fiber of his being, and every bit of it was as intense as Steve Rogers could get, and it was both flattering and sometimes infinitely terrifying.

Not because Bucky hated the thought; he loved Steve too, always had. It was just the way the blond’s love could sometimes drive him to do extreme things.

Extremely _stupid_ things.

The worst part was, Steve knew it, but he chose to do them anyway, because he loved Bucky.

The brunet swallows down hardly as his earlier calm serenity was replaced with the kind of an ache he was fairly certain Steve felt when it came to him.

”I do. Otherwise I would not stand your awful jokes. You could bore people to death with those.”

Steve tells him finally with an amused smile, and Bucky almost chokes on his own breath, before chuckling helplessly. Gods, if Steve was a fool for loving him so deeply, he was about as bad.

”I suppose everything about me is deadly nowadays.”

The brunet finally manages to comment, trying not to smile. It was a morbid joke referencing his past, but it was a coping mechanism as good as any. Humor could do wonders.

Steve hums at that, his eyes having gone hooded, and Bucky was pretty sure he’d soon literally melt under that gaze if Steve didn’t stop. The problem was, he didn’t really want Steve to stop looking at him like that. He opens his mouth to try and say something witty, or something that could hopefully embarrass Steve enough to make him look away, but before a single sound leaves his mouth, the blond leans closer and silences him with his mouth.

This kiss was different from the previous ones, it had a lot more heat to it, and Bucky found himself leaning back down against the pillows and blankets, as Steve pushed forward, up until he was partially resting on top of him, both hands cupping his face as the blond deepened the kiss.

It felt almost if he’d broken some sort of a dam, almost like Steve had been wanting to do this for such a long time now, but hadn’t dared, not until Bucky had given him the permission to do so.

One of the hands slips into his hair, behind his head, fingers mingling on to the brown locks and tugging on them lightly. Bucky lets out a slight gasp, but before Steve could back away and apologize, he uses his only hand to wrap it around his neck, holding him right there.

Steve lets out a surprised noise at first, but then practically melts into it, resting more of his weight on Bucky as he did so. They do that for a while, parting at times to breathe. After the third or fourth time - Bucky was seriously losing count - the brunet chuckles a bit breathlessly, gaining a curious look from the man above him.

”I really did that in an attempt to get _you_ to relax so you could sleep.”

He admits after a moment with a sigh, gaining an amused hum from Steve, who dips his head down to lightly trace his jaw with his lips.

It sent a slight shiver down Bucky’s spine, but otherwise he remains still, noting that Steve’s weight and warmth was starting to lull him to sleep.

”It sounds like you are the one about to doze off.”

The blond chuckles a bit, resting his head against Bucky’s chest to hear the slightly elevated heartbeat beneath his ear. It was one of his favorite sounds in the world.

”So that was your plan huh? Get me to doze off so I’ll stop nagging?”

The brunet chuckles tiredly, slapping his head lightly with a playful smile.

”You know I’d never do something as sneaky as that.”

Steve comments solemnly, putting on his best fake innocent look as he looked up at Bucky, to the point the brunet couldn’t stop laughing. Steve snickers too at that, feeling his muscles relax a little as the stress slowly bleeds away from his body.

It was hard to remain tense when Bucky was smiling at him like that.

The blond shifts after a moment, and Bucky lifts the covers enough to let Steve slip right beside him under them.

Steve slips his arm around the brunet’s waist again, tugging him close and resting his head on the armless shoulder. The brunet hums and nuzzles his hair a bit, noting that Steve was in fact getting sleepy too now, thank whatever gods - maybe that thunder guy Steve hung out with? Hell if he knew. The brunet waited until he sensed Steve’s breathing settle down, indicating he was in a deep sleep.

With a sigh, Bucky rests back and closes his eyes as well, pressing as close to the man beside him as he could, knowing that if Steve would feel him shift too far away, he’d wake up and likely be unable to sleep again.

After a moment, his blue eyes slid closed, and the former Winter Soldier falls into slumber as well, resting his cheek against the soft blond locks beside his head.

Steve’s days in the future would likely be long and hard, for the damn _punk_ couldn’t keep himself outta trouble, but for this one moment, he was happy and calm, nuzzled up beside his Bucky.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still dead and hunting down all the Grapes in my house btw


End file.
